


'tis the damn season

by xanderbot13



Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Christmas, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28596456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xanderbot13/pseuds/xanderbot13
Summary: 'tis the damn season, it's almost xmas again and 9S and 801S spend cuddly time together by the fireplace, drinking tea, eating cookies, talking, and taking comfort in each other.
Relationships: 9S/801S (NieR: Automata)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	'tis the damn season

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JoeyWrites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoeyWrites/gifts), [jordypordy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jordypordy/gifts).



> for my beloved Gay Scanner Squad 3< merry shitscram feckers

The light from the fireplace gives 9S' face a soft glow that makes him look ethereal. Little flames dance in his eyes, like remembering a dream from ages ago. He's sitting on the soft blanket they've set on the carpet right in front of the fireplace, hugging his legs to his chest, looking almost forlorn. 801S observes him from the hall to the kitchen, holding a tray in his hands. He quietly makes his way to the living room and sits beside him. 9S perks up when he looks at him and gives him a soft smile. 801S smiles in return and places the tray in front of them, then hands him the cup of tea on the right.

"Your tea, your highness," he says teasing.

9S snickers and takes in the sweet smell of the tea before taking a sip. "It's good. Thank you," he smiles before taking a few more sips.

801S grins as he takes a cookie from the plate on the tray and takes a bite before offering the other half to his boyfriend. 9S leans forward and takes it from his hand with his mouth. 

He lifts his eyebrows slightly. "Theyr gooth," he says with his mouth full and finishes chewing.

801S smiles. "6O came by earlier today. Said she baked them for us."

"Nice. I'll make sure to thank her later," he says as he takes another cookie from the plate.

801S takes a few sips from his own tea and reaches up to gently stroke 9S' hair. 9S immediately starts purring, making 801S chuckle. He leans over and kisses his cheek. 9S smiles and cheekily glances at the mistletoe above the fireplace before he turns to give him a peck on the lips. They both smile softly at each other when he pulls away, before 801S pulls him back in by his sweater's collar for another kiss. 9S indulges him gladly, kissing his lips delicately. They both revel in each other's taste for a moment, softly nipping and licking at each other before 9S tests him by tracing the tip of his tongue over the inside of his lower lip. 801S opens his mouth for him to explore freely and 9S dives right in, his tongue eager to please. 801S sighs contentedly and tangles his free hand in his hair. 9S blindly sets his tea down on the tray and surrounds him with his arms, pulling him closer. One of his hands starts to crawl under his shirt, and it takes all of 801S' strength to pull back.

"Wait, not yet. Your tea," he mumbles.

"Fuck the tea," 9S whispers against his lips, tightening his grip around him.

"I'd much rather  _ drink _ the tea and then have you fuck me,” he teases.

9S snorts. "Dork," he whispers against his lips and kisses him again.

801S kisses him back for a moment before pulling away again. "Please?" He pouts. "I made it especially for you." 

Tea is one of his love languages. 9S knows this and smiles. He looks into his puppy eyes and kisses his pout with a grin. "Alright, alright. If my beloved insists," he says as he unwraps his arms from around him and reaches for his cup again.

801S smiles softly and nuzzles his shoulder before reaching for his own cup. They sip their tea and eat cookies in comfortable silence for a moment, just enjoying the warmth from the fireplace, their tea and each other's presence. 801S glances at 9S, looking down at his absolutely hideous green Christmas sweater that he ironically gifted him a couple Christmases ago and chuckles silently. 

"What's so funny?" 9S glances at him.

"I just can't believe you still wear that sweater," he shakes his head.

"Well,  _ you _ gave it to me so now you gotta put up with it," 9S teases.

"I didn't think you'd unironically love it."

"It's soft and warm," he defends.

"Like you," he reaches up and softly pinches his cheek. 

9S huffs and looks away as a faint pinkish hue colors his cheeks. 

801S lets out a soft laugh and lets go of his cheek. He takes a last sip from his tea before putting his empty cup down and leaning his head on 9S' shoulder. He reaches down and idly traces little shapes on his boyfriend’s knee as he hums the Christmas song playing in the background. 9S places his empty cup back on the tray and wraps an arm around him, bringing him closer. He rests his head on top of his and stays quiet for a moment. 801S closes his eyes and sighs softly, feeling warm and safe. 

It’s been like this for a couple years now. 9S should feel happy. He’s warm. Safe. The ones he loves the most are by his side, always will be. There is peace...but is there really? 

“I don’t deserve this,” he whispers to himself. 

801S opens his eyes and lifts an eyebrow. “What?” he mutters.

9S shakes his head. “Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“Nines…” He lifts his head up to look at him. 9S’ eyes glisten with tears threatening to fall. 801S strokes his cheek softly. “Nines, talk to me.”

9S shakes his head. “I don’t wanna ruin this moment.” His eyes are fixated on the fireplace. The flames reflect on his gleaming eyes, adding to the torment on his features. 

“You won’t. If there’s something bothering you, I want to know. I want to be here to help you,” 801S mutters.

9S stays silent for a moment, thinking of the right words to express the anguish inside of him.

“I...don’t feel I deserve. This happiness...It doesn’t feel right...Year after year we do this. We celebrate old human traditions, live our lives pretending like we know what we’re doing, pretending there’s a purpose. But I...I got to survive. And live the life I always wanted. Even though I caused so much harm and destruction. While so many of our friends had to suffer and die in such awful ways. I’ve killed so many...” he takes in a shaky breath. “And  _ you _ ...I’ve hurt you so much. I kept forgetting you. Us. Everything we were. I kept fucking up over and over and over...all because I was too damn thirsty to know more and more,” He tries to swallow the lump in his throat. “I hurt 2B. I hurt 21O. I hurt everyone around me, all because of my damn selfishness,” His voice breaks. “How can you love me, even after all of this?” A few tears escape the corners of his eyes, sliding down his cheek. 

801S bites his lip and catches his tears, wiping them away with his thumb. _Because_ _it wasn’t your fault. You didn’t do it on purpose. You didn’t know what would happen._ He knew saying all of this would fall on deaf ears, so instead he kept quiet for a moment before replying. 

“You...we...were all part of a sinister project that didn't give us many choices. What we were put through was cruel, and we had  _ no _ control of our situation. None of us are to blame. Not you. Not me. Nobody but YoRHa.”

9S frowns and shakes his head. “I know how much it hurt you. How much it hurt 2B. And all our friends who are no longer with us…”

“It still doesn’t make it your fault, Nines,” 801S sighs. “And yes...losing you was the most painful thing every time. I can’t say it’s been easy. But hey...we’re here now. We survived. Whether we feel like we deserve it or not, we’re here now, and the best we can do is keep on living for the ones who cannot. And help make a better future. For us. For all of us,” he takes his hand between both of his and strokes it with his thumb.

9S nods slowly and stays silent for a moment before cracking a tiny smile. “How do you always know what to say?” he whispers.

801S shrugs. “I just say whatever bullshit I think of and hope it works,” he mutters as he keeps stroking his hand softly. 

9S snorts. “Well...It’s working.”

“Good...I’m glad,” he whispers and leans his head back on his shoulder. 

9S wraps his arm back around him and nuzzles his hair. 801S sighs contentedly and kisses his shoulder. He clenches and unclenches his fists one after the other, squeezing his fingers into his palms as a way of self soothing. There's a hurricane of emotions inside him that he cannot verbalize and a nauseating kind of pain deep in his chest.  _ Not now. Not when he needs me at my best, _ he thinks, trying to push it all away and keep a strong façade. But the heart stopping waves of pain don't stop and he starts to silently come undone. It takes some time before he finds his voice again.

“Nines?” he whispers.

“Hm?”

“...Why me?”

9S lifts an eyebrow and looks down at him. “Why you what?”

801S hesitates. “Why are you with me? I’m nothing special."

9S opens his mouth to protest, but he continues.

“You blame yourself for the entire world’s problems, but you’re.  _ So _ amazing. So strong. Kind. Noble. Friendly. You deserve all the greatness in the world. But I...I was never more than a  _ disgusting _ little fag. You knew about my bad reputation with the other scanners and you still reached out to me and...you’ve always been so unbelievably kind to me. So warm and caring...I could  _ never _ not be in love with you, not even when I tried. But  _ me? _ I’m-”

“Beautiful,” 9S interrupts as he surrounds his waist with his arms and plants a kiss on the top of his head. “Absolutely beautiful. You’re nothing like what they say. You have a beautiful personality, and you care about everyone so much. You’re insanely smart, creative, and just loads of fun to be around. How could I possibly not love you?”

801S bites his lip as tears start brimming his eyes. "You don't think I’m repulsive?" He asks in a small voice.

He wants 9S to tell him how fucking disgusting he is. He wants him to shove him away and tell him he's filthy. Repugnant. Awful. Nauseating. Absolutely loathsome. He wants to hear him call him a disgusting, worthless whore and to kick him out the door and slam it in his face. But then...

"Eddy…" 9S knits his eyebrows together and gently pushes his chin up to get a look at his face. "Why ever would I think that about you, lovely?"

801S' cheeks redden at the little endearment and he looks off to the side to avoid his eyes. He blinks and a few tears stream down his face. He finds it hard to speak, so he just tries to breathe slowly for now as 9S gently wipes his tears away and peppers tiny kisses on his rosy cheeks. 

"You know...about the things I've done with others. Before you. About the rumors. How I'm so easy…I’m so disgusting-"

"Shhh, no, no. I don't judge you, Eddy,” he says firmly, looking him in the eyes. “I love you for you, and if you've had past lovers, or done things you’re not proud of, it’s alright. All I care about is the here and now. And right now, we’re together and you make me  _ so fucking happy. _ And I can only hope I do the same for you,” he mutters and plants a soft kiss on his forehead. 

“You do. I’ve never been happier,” he smiles. “I just. I hope I’m not dreaming. I can hardly believe this is all real, that YoRHa and the war is over. That we’ve been together for this long now and gods, I am  _ so in love _ with you,” he sighs into his neck and leans his head up to kiss him.

9S catches his lips and kisses him back fervently. “Me too,” he whispers between kisses. “Don’t ever doubt it, lovely.”

801S smiles into their kiss as he places his hands on his chest and pulls him closer. 9S tightens his embrace and deepens their kiss by leaning his head to the side. The tip of his tongue glides over his lower lip and 801S gladly opens his mouth for him once again. They both get lost in each other’s taste as their tongues play with one another. 9S’ his hands run up and down his back, begging to feel more of him. He takes 801S’ lower lip between his teeth and softly bites and sucks on it. A tiny squeak escapes his boyfriend’s mouth and 9S laughs softly.

“Cute,” he whispers against his lips before diving back in for more. 

801S’ groan turns into a soft moan as 9S bites his lower lip again. He only pulls back once his lips are red as a cherry. He smirks, looking down at them, proud of his artwork. 9S leans down to plant a few more kisses on his reddened lips before moving down to trail kisses down his jaw and neck. 801S gasps as 9S takes his soft, supple skin between his teeth and sucks on it, repeating this over and over all over his neck as his hands crawl under his shirt to feel the warm skin on his back. His fingers trace his spine gently as he leaves yet another mark on his neck.

“Please,” he breathes, “let me make love to you.”

801S’ cheeks grow hot and he can’t reply fast enough as another soft moan escapes his lips when 9S sucks on his collarbone.

“Let me show you how much I adore you,” he mutters against his skin as his lips travel up his neck. 801S shudders at the sensation. “Today. Tomorrow. Always,” he kisses his way back to his mouth.

801S tangles his fingers in his hair and captures his lips as he lets 9S pull him onto his lap to straddle his hips. Newly formed tears trickle down his cheeks and he frowns at himself for getting so overwhelmed with emotion so easily. He pulls back for a moment to look into 9S’ eyes. 

“Always?” he whispers.

9S looks up at him and smiles, “Always,” he repeats, pressing their foreheads together.

801S bites back a sob and caresses his face, his fingers delicately tracing his features, memorizing everything about them as if he were to fade away any second. 

“This is real,” he says, more to himself than to 9S.

“It is,” 9S replies with a peck to his lips. “It really is,” he says as his hands softly stroke his back under his shirt.

801S’ face slowly crumples in tears under his touch and he hides his expression in the crook of his neck. 

“Eddy?” 9S’ voice is laced with concern.

801S shakes his head. “I’m okay. I’m just. So happy that you’re here, and you’re okay. We’re okay. It’s almost Christmas again and we’re okay. We’re finally okay,” he sobs into his neck and hugs him tightly.

“Aww, baby,” 9S tightens his embrace, pulling him flush against his chest. “I’m really happy too,” he sighs, “I’m so glad I get to remember everything now. I never wanna forget you,” he kisses his temple. “I want to remember this moment forever and ever. And every single moment together.” 

801S smiles and kisses his neck, softly nibbling on his skin. 9S lets out a quiet gasp. He peppers a few more hot, wet kisses on his neck before moving back up to look into his eyes.

“Make me all yours tonight,” he whispers against his lips. 

“As you wish, my beloved,” 9S replies before he captures his lips once again and finally lifts his shirt up and over his head. 

Once it’s gone, he all but attacks him, ravaging his lips fiercely as he wraps his arms around him and lowers him onto the blanket. 9S’ green, ugly Christmas sweater narrowly misses the fireplace and ends up hanging from one of the lower branches on the Christmas tree as 801S gets rid of 9S’ clothes, throwing them all over the place. 

**Author's Note:**

> stalk me or whatever -->[twitter](https://twitter.com/hisgh0stlover)
> 
> read more fluffy fics by my friendssss!!!!!! 
> 
> [Moving Forward](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28596036/chapters/70084350?show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#main) by jordypordy
> 
> [It's all in the past](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27992691#main) by Kiloueka
> 
> [Fluffcember 2020](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27806278/chapters/68075644) by Attenreon


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